My Other Child

I write about my two littlest children all the time. I do have an older one though. He’s nine. He’s going to be a scientist when he grows up… a DNA mutating scientist to be specific. He reads science books about anthropology, outer space, and all things repulsive. He also really likes The Diary of a Wimpy Kid but I explain to him, that wimpy is not really a nice word. Some kids, like him, are “highly sensitive children” and that that’s actually a good thing, that will make him an amazing adult.

His name is Noah. He’s half grown up now.

It went too fast.

Sometimes, when I’m laying with my daughter Ayla, I squint and pretend for a moment that she is Noah. Their features are similar enough that if I squint, I can live in the past for just a moment. It usually ends with a sadness, as I wonder who I will squint with when my youngest child is nine.

I am highly immersed in the world of infants and toddlers because of my blogging for Everything Birth. There is a whole other part of me that I don’t share on here though that you will all become one day if you aren’t already. If you don’t already know:

It happens too fast.

Right now, I listen to nearly endless monolouges about Ben 10 creatures and Spy Gear. Yesterday, I sat with my fingers on a lie detector testing machine as my nine year old questioned me about the missing chunks of his chocolate bar. (Not really sure why it said I was lying… broken piece of junk.)

Instead of being asked, “What’s Dat?” I get asked way harder questions like, “Why is Jagger so mean to me?” or “What happens when you die?” and “How do you kiss a girl?”

It went by too fast.

If only I could squint and go back in time… I’d burn each smell, touch and tiny, unrecognizable word into my memory.

 

8 Comments

  1. Crystal

    Cheers to Noah, and thank you Dawn for this.

    My oldest turned 13 last month. He too wants to be a scientist, and loves all thing herps(that’s boy language for reptiles and amphibians combined)
    I have actually had people ask me if he is ok because i don’t talk about him much.

    I am completely blown away by how quickly they grow, and what an incredible young adult he is becoming.

    His name is Zedekiah- “Zed”

    thanks Dawn, for getting us to stop and think….. and cry a bit!

  2. i have 4 kida and my oldest is 8 then its 4, 3 and 3 mos it is har becuase i got my tubes ties this time around because we’ve found that no form of birth control works for me lol. and even thought i was one of those teens who never wanted to have kids now that i got them its a diffrent story. but the point is that i do have boughts where i simply break down n bawl because i know that i will never have another baby and even though my hubby thinks im nuts becuase i do complain alot about having so many kids at once. it is very sad to know that for the first time since i was 18 that i will not have some snuggly whiney most of the time wet for some odd reason lil one ties to my hip. and makes me wonder who i will be when they are all in school. for sure it will be a totaly change in everything i have been in my adult life!

  3. leanne

    Dawn, i think part of the reason we DON’T remember each smell, touch and tiny, unrecognizable word is by design – because it would be too painful – it would be mourning a person who no longer existed over and over again as they pass through each stage

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *