Scared of Giving Birth?

Are you about to give birth for the first time and getting scared? Are you getting cold feet about your delivery? Are you starting to wonder if maybe you can’t do it?

It’s OK.

I wish I were there to give you a hug, but since I can’t, I can try to talk you through your nervousness.

Let’s think about this logically.

You are a woman. Your body was either designed to or has evolved to (depending on your belief structure) deliver babies. In the whole grand scheme of things, this is one thing that you should not stress about.

I can’t promise you that you will make it through grad school. I can’t promise you that you will be able to sew a ball gown or cook a turkey at thanksgiving. I can’t promise you people will like you. I can, however, promise you that, with the exception of some fluke situation, you can deliver this baby.

Oh that’s the catch isn’t it? The fluke situation?

I had a fluke situation.

Fluke situations do happen. But they’re called fluke situations for a reason. They almost never happen. When they do happen, there’s pretty much nothing we can do about them. When they do happen, remarkably, we are also given (or have adapted) the mental tools to deal with them. It’s in our nature. We are women.

If you’ve made it to the point where you’re starting to chicken out, you’ve made it far enough to relax.

Your labor might not go according to your birth plan. Labors are as varied as the babies born from them.  Is that something to stress about though? Not really.

I’m not helping am I? I’m just reassuring you that you’re absolutely not in control, just like you were afraid of, huh?

I guess that’s really what it comes down to. The cold feet that you are feeling might just be you realizing that you are not in control. The myriad of possibilities before you now are just a part of your new role as a mother.

Here’s what I want you to remember: No matter what happens, you will be equipped to deal with it. No matter what happens, if you turn inward and realize your own strength, you will be equipped to handle it.

Especially birthing your child.

Think of all the women who have come before you. Birth is as natural as eating.  You don’t get nervous before eating a sandwich; worried that you may choke.  You don’t need to be scared of delivering your child either.

Relax woman. You’re a natural.

For further support, please read Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth